"Take your starting positions please.”
For three-time Olympic runner Suzy Favor Hamilton, these words fuelled not only the adrenaline rush she felt before each race, but also a deep sense of dread.
In her memoir Fast Girl: a Life Spent Running from Madness, the reader learns that running is Suzy’s whole life.
It’s what she does best.
Living in Madison, Wisconsin, Suzy was the innocent all-American girl, the ultimate athlete. But things weren’t what they seemed.
Her family, who was ashamed of their son’s mental illness, stays predictably silent when Suzy becomes bulimic.
The first half of the book chronicles Suzy’s love of running, her obsession to win and be the best, and her slow descent into severe anxiety, self-doubt and depression.
A pleaser by nature, Suzy thrives when she gets a trainer who works her hard, and she qualifies for the Olympics.
Her refuge in running is broken though, when reality intrudes into her thoughts and she begins to obsess about things.
Immobilized by her depression she turns to more self-destructive behaviour.
Suzy eventually marries Mark Hamilton, her high school sweetheart, who has superhuman patience and sticks by Suzy through thick and thin.
Their daughter Kylie, mentioned only marginally, is the collateral damage in Suzy’s story.
When they move to Malibu, Suzy soon gets big-time endorsements for the upcoming Olympics where she’ll be competing.
With more contracts, media attention and celebrity status, the pressure is on to win gold.
Afraid to disappoint anyone, Suzy runs in three Olympics, even though by this point, she dreads competing.
Overwhelmed by life, she spins out of control, goes on Prozac, and her extreme behaviour escalates.
The second half of the book is all about Suzy’s hyper sexuality and her need for more and more adrenaline highs.
To fulfill that need, she begins to lead a double life as Kelly, a high paid escort in Las Vegas.
Her home life crumbles and she’s only happy when she’s having sex with rich clients.
Living a risky, reckless life and enthralled with the jewelry, clothes and other gifts from her wealthy clients, Suzy’s hooked.
Making big money and having zero impulse control, eventually her double life crashes and burns.
More a book about Suzy’s sexual exploits than bipolar disease, it’s clear that mental illness doesn’t make you rich.
But scandal sure does.
For other popular reading suggestions check out Richmond Public Library’s website at yourlibrary.ca/goodbooks/.
Shelley Civkin is the communications officer at the Richmond Public Library.
