Richmondite Way Hu didn’t know anything about Pink Shirt Day before her daughter told her about it in 2008.
“One day, my daughter came home and asked me: ‘Mom, could you please help me find a pink shirt for school tomorrow?’ Then I began learning the whole history and the meaning of Pink Shirt Day,” said Hu, who later joined her daughter in wearing pink to support its message about anti-bullying.
Hu’s daughter is now at the University of Toronto after graduating from Richmond Secondary.
However, Hu still has some pink T-shirts at home and will hand them out if her friends’ children need them on Feb. 23 this year.
Wearing pink is a significant first step to raise awareness about anti-bullying, said Hu, but, she added, there are other things parents can do to help kids deal with bullying.
Growing up, Hu’s daughter Mindy was always an outspoken child who was never scared to stand up for what’s right, Hu recalled.
“When my daughter was in Grade 3, one of her classmates was being called ‘fat’ in public by another classmate. My daughter stood up right away and told the bully, ‘please stop using abusive language like this,’” said Hu.
She said she feels incredibly proud of her daughter for speaking up, not just for herself, but also for others.
In addition to wearing pink to support anti-bullying, Hu thinks it’s also necessary for parents to have discussions with their children about compassion, kindness and self-love.
“My daughter has taught me a lot and it has been a learning process for both of us. I look forward to my daughter bringing these values to work, to her family and friend circle soon,” said Hu.
Another Richmondite Kathy Miao, who immigrated from China with her family several years ago, agreed with Hu and encouraged fellow parents to keep an open line of communication with their children.
“Sometimes children don’t want to reveal their vulnerable side to others, including their loved ones. So my husband and I try to be our children’s trusted figure, making them feel safe and comfortable to discuss any issues related to bullying,” said Miao.
Miao’s family has a daily routine — no matter how busy they are, they share funny stories or things they hope will add to their dinner table conversations every night.
“One time, my daughter Emma told us she had a bad day at school. Later we figured out other children gave her a super mean nickname and she hated it,” said Miao.
Miao explained that her daughter wasn’t a pushover, but her personality wasn’t “aggressive” either.
Therefore, instead of asking Emma to fight back, Miao and her husband gave her another alternative.
“The best way is to talk it out and come to an understanding with Emma while helping her to build inner strength,” said Miao, adding the whole process might take time.
To cheer Emma up, Miao and her husband Peter Wang even played a game together — they started creating fun nicknames for each other.
“We had a blast in the end and Emma slowly understood why others gave her a nickname. She didn’t feel that upset anymore. She now could see the problem from different perspectives,” said Wang.
“It’s important to observe and listen to children. We need to let our kids know that we are always there if they have anything to share,” said Wang, adding it’s important to build children’s confidence by cheering them on.
Wang said Pink Shirt Day is a learning process for all immigrant parents.
