The time I got my test back with a shamefully low mark, I didn't feel awful primarily because it would bring down my average (although that was definitely part of it).
I felt guilty because I knew how I should have studied better, and that I really could have studied better.
That mark was more a reflection of my willpower than my intelligence. But knowing I could have received a higher mark did not replace the number written in red ink at the top of the booklet.
I think this applies to a lot of us, and not just within the context of school. A lot of the time we know what we should do if we want to reach our potential or remain consistent and true to our beliefs and priorities.
We know procrastinating is a dangerous habit, and that bullying is wrong, as is cheating, stealing. etc. But sometimes in the moment, we just get lazy, or we get scared, or we don't want to make everyone else uncomfortable.
It's a matter of strength of character. Are we confident enough to stand up for the underdog, if it means facing our friends? Are we disciplined enough to close YouTube and focus exclusively on the essay we need to write?
Are we strong enough to be the honest amazing person our friends know us as, even when no one is watching?
Self-control will develop our strength of character.
And like a muscle that will get flabby without exercise-our self-control will lack the backbone it needs if we're used to ignoring it.
Social media isn't really helping either. If you look to the advertisements and commercials, self-control is always shown in a negative light.
According to them, it's the force that's keeping you from eating one more of their delicious cookies, buying all the clothes you want, or really enjoying yourself at that party.
According to them, it's the annoying, nagging voice that keeps you from really doing what you want, when you want.
But, I don't think self-control is supposed to be like a mental chaperone. It's something I wish I had more of.
It's the ability to stick with the plan and get things done, and it allows me to trust myself with a resolution.
Self-control is necessary in anything that requires difficulty, struggle, and commitment.
But gosh, sometimes it's just so hard. Anna Toth is a J.N. Burnett graduate and currently attends UBC.
