It took two weeks of scratching before the penny dropped: my son's head was infested with pediculus humanus capitis -- a.k.a. head lice.
By then, he'd infested the rest of us, and as we'd been stoically preparing for the first week of school, a few hundred members of the pediculus family had been feasting on blood from our scalps.
They'd multiplied prodigiously and watched with pride as their nits hatched into nymphs and grew to healthy-sized adults.
It was our first lice episode ever, so I didn't know quite what to look for that first time. My son's scalp looked clean on quick inspection and there were no obvious creepy crawlies jostling for space.
It wasn't until a more experienced friend plucked a large louse, alive and scrabbling, from his head that I realized I was a lice virgin: completely inexperienced and without a clue.
Laundry. I started with the laundry. Beds were stripped, sheets and duvets washed and everything dried on high heat.
Hubby dropped a cool $60 at the pharmacy on over-the-counter lice products and we resolved we'd douse the whole family just to be sure.
We lined the kids up over the bathtub, emptied bottles of permethrin over their heads and combed with the little plastic combs that came in the lice treatment package.
With clean hair and freshly laundered sheets, I determined some positive thinking was in order.
"I think we've done it," I said with as much confidence as I could muster. "The lice are dead."
Hah. I didn't have a clue.
I scratched all through the next five days, convincing myself it was psychological and that the lice and nits had been thoroughly exterminated.
Then my friend popped by and took a look. "Bad news," she said, plucking a couple of bloodsuckers from my scalp. "There's still a healthy population."
I sat down at the computer and Googled the "Lice Squad," a Canadian company that does house visits.
At $85 per hour plus mileage, I knew theirs was going to be an expensive house call, but by this point I was on my knees.
The permethrin had failed me and the lice were winning. I was low on laundry detergent and even lower on confidence.
"We need help," I confessed to their voicemail. "Come soon."
Corinne walked through the door 24 hours later, toting a carry-on. She listened to our permethrin experience, shaking her head.
"They won't even allow those ingredients to be used in your garden," she cautioned. "And the permethrin makers are putting them on consumer's heads. What's more, it's a $5-billion industry!"
Donning an apron, she extracted a stainless steel comb called the Louse Trap, mixed up a batch of "The NitPickers Secret" and got to work.
With six infested heads and a long evening ahead of us, we set up a human conveyor belt. Adults in shower caps, their hair smothered with the secret potion, got to work on yawning children, combing their hair and cleaning the combs on rolls of toilet paper before repeating the process.
Soon the kitchen table was covered in pieces of toilet paper bearing evidence of decimated lice populations in all stages of development.
Empty eggs came out on those combs. The carcasses of barely visible nymphs showed up and large, ugly adult lice crawled vainly around until they were drowned in a water-filled Tupperware.
Two-and-a-half hours later, Corinne was satisfied that six heads were lice free.
She sold us $50 worth of product, advising us to use it five days later just to be sure the problem was completely resolved. Our bill was a whopping $320, but we paid it with relief.
Our virginity lost, we finally had peace of mind, and with it an understanding of the lice lifecycle and how to defeat it.
THE LICE-HEAD'S SURVIVAL GUIDE
- Where to find 'em:
Lice hot spots are located around the ears, at the crown of the head and at the nape of the neck. Use bright lights and magnification to see them, looking for red scabs.
- Lice love a clean head, so don't equate lice infestation with dirty hair.
- Laundry Overkill:
Don't go overboard on the laundry. Lice can survive off the human head for 48 hours, so if they're crawling around your shirts, sheets and pillows, it's high heat in the tumble dryer that will kill them. Tumble dry for 30 minutes, vacuum items that cannot be dried, and for those things that cannot be vacuumed or tumble dried, set them aside for up to 24-48 hours.
- Toxin Awareness:
Many over-the-counter lice treatment products contain permethrin -- a neurotoxin that's considered a pesticide.
"When the product doesn't work, parents will use it more times than is recommended," says Dawn Mucci, CEO and founder of Lice Squad Canada "That poses a risk on children."
- Lice Squad recommends one of four head lice treatments: its own -- enzyme-based product called the NitPickers Secret, smothering agents such as olive or coconut oil, the use of controlled, heated air or straight reduction combing using a really good tool, like the Louse Trap Comb.
- Practice Prevention:
Make lice checks a part of your regular hygiene practice, Mucci suggests.
