I recently told my mother’s care home that I’d be away on vacation, and gave them some emergency contact numbers.
Then, I realized that there’s no such thing as vacation anymore. I’m retired. Life is one big vacation.
Actually, yes and no.
While my time is my own, I’ve set things up so that I do have responsibilities, deadlines and commitments.
Which is a good thing. Structure helps avoid laziness and too much time in front of the TV.
There’s an entirely different energy to my vacations now.
Before retirement, I’d squeeze every last ounce of excitement out of my travels, exploring new areas and trying new activities.
Now, I’m more laid back and relaxed. My attitude is one of acceptance of what is, rather than chasing every bright, shiny new experience.
Maybe this is just a product of age, but I don’t think so. It’s a new mind-set.
What I’m pursuing now are ideas and beliefs, rather than places and stuff.
My spiritual and religious life has expanded tenfold, and life is much fuller now.
In all honesty, I think I used my busy, stressful work life as an excuse not to delve into things spiritual.
It was an all-or-nothing proposition for me.
Consequently, I did myself a disservice wasting time wallowing in anxiety and spinning my proverbial wheels, when I could have been on the path to a much happier life.
Long ago, a wise man once told me that when you play the “all-or-nothing” game, you always end up with nothing.
Life is not 100 per cent one thing or another.
It’s a blend of this and that, adding up to what one can only hope will be happiness and fulfillment.
Take your joy when and where you can find it. And never stop looking.
Taking stock of my life is a bit like cleaning house.
It feels great to get rid of the excess baggage that’s weighed me down emotionally.
Freeing up space for the more meaningful things in life is what counts.
I know you didn’t ask, but my advice is to spend your time on what matters most: The people and things that make your heart sing; the acts of kindness that make others’ hearts sing; and doing the right thing. Now, not later.
This is the time to ask those big questions like “Why am I here?”; “What’s my purpose in life?”; “How can I make my mark on the world?”
Hopefully, the rest of my life will be spent discovering the answers to those questions.
Now that’s a journey worth taking!
Shelley Civkin is a retired communications officer with the Richmond Public Library
