With Monday, June 15 being the World Elder Abuse Awareness Day, I thought I’d express some thoughts on the subject.
One of the most prominent causes of elder abuse and neglect are: caregiver burnout, pre-existing family dynamics, and ignorance. Caregiver burnout tends to build up subtly, and it is often ignored and put to the “back burner.”
Caregivers tend to say they are “fine” and let things pile up to the breaking point. Caring for the elderly takes enormous amounts of patience and internal resources. Unfortunately, most caregivers I meet are running on empty; and they only ask for help when they have reached the point of despair.
Think of it this way: you have a certain amount of “patience units” at your disposal. Things that add units include regular sleep, scheduled rest time, effective stress management, great diet, exercise, and emotional support. Things that rob you of “patience units” are jobs, busy schedules, emotional turmoil, raising a family, and not practicing self-care. How many “patience units” do you have left? And how are you planning to replenish them? It’s worth thinking about because caregiver burnout can cause serious harm not only to your health, but to your loved ones’ safety.
Family dynamics can make you or break you when it comes to caring for your elders. Difficult family dynamics put elders at an increased risk for abuse and neglect.
Recognizing and addressing family relationships makes a huge difference in quality of care you are providing for your loved one. Positive; or at least somewhat repaired family relationships are the single most important protective factor when it comes to caring for aging parents.
Ignorance is one of the most dangerous risk factors for elder abuse and neglect.
I have met some family members whose behavior towards their loved ones borders on abuse and neglect. None of them were aware of that until it was pointed out to them. The biggest reason was ignorance.
Dealing with dementia-related behaviors can turn into a disaster if you have limited understanding of what your loved one can and cannot control.
Seeking education and support is the only way to ensure you are on the right track.
Many caregivers make the mistake of assuming they know exactly what they are doing when it comes to care. I hate to disappoint you, but every caregiver needs support regardless of how much they think they know.
One simply cannot be objective when it comes to the highly stressful and emotional task of caring for elderly.
Educate yourself, watch those “patience units” and seek help when you need it.
Karyna Matsyuk is a registered clinical counsellor and a licensed practical nurse. She specializes in helping families of all ages and stages to overcome life’s challenges.Her website is www.caretoconnect.ca
