Most of us seniors are no longer working highpower jobs, raising kids or going bungee jumping, but that doesn't mean we don't experience stress.
I'd say one of my biggest stressor has been the tendency to say "yes" when I really mean "no."
It's been suggested to me (more than once) I should refuse requests more often, but it's tough to say no. I want to be liked. I want to do what people asked of me. But doing so has lead to times of stress, and its consequences. Over the years, I've come to realize the world doesn't stop when I say "no, sorry, I can't."
And that little bit of less stress has been good for me. In fact, it gets things done, like getting up in the morning when I'd rather stay in bed, or cooking dinner when I don't feel like it.
Another stress many seniors experience is losing one's driver's license. It doesn't matter that you've never had an accident, chances are, there will come a day when you'll no longer be able to drive.
Failing your driving test can be traumatic and leave you feeling helpless. It's especially hard for someone who is used to driving others. You feel like you're letting them down.
One woman I know failed her test recently and now can only drive if she has someone beside her with a valid license. It's hard on her to ask a friend to come with her every time she needs milk. And not all her friends have a valid driver's licence anyway.
Losing your license is yet another one of those humilities us seniors have to endure - but only if we see it like that.
The fact is there are alternatives. We can have groceries delivered. We can use Handy Dart, or taxi savers, or take the bus. Granted, we loose some freedom, but perhaps we gain some cooperation and perspective.
Part of living well means accepting change and learning to live with new realities. It may be a bother to ask a friend to come with you to the grocery story, but we could also see it as a time to visit, a time to recognize we all need support and an opportunity to be there for each other.
And if it's stressful to hand over your driver's licence, imagine the stress of being in a serious car accident because you couldn't react fast enough.
We also need to recognize the stress we cause others when we refuse to acknowledge our driving limitations.
A recent survey commissioned by BCAA found that 72 per cent of British Columbians are concerned about the safety of senior drivers. So let's talk.
We can come up with many good, safe solutions if we're practical, creative and if we see change as an opportunity not a limitation.
Moreover, changes don't have to just be personal, they can also be political - like advocating for better bus or Handy Dart service. We might not have driver's licences, but we still have a voice.
Olive McDonald is a senior living in Steveston.
